From the musical “The Orchid” 1907 Words by Vincent Bryan Music by E. Ray Goetz
Sheet Music
Accompaniment
Lyrics
Chorus
He goes to church on Sunday
He passes round the Contribution box
But meet him in the office on a Monday
He’s as crooked and as cunning as a fox
On Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday
Friday, Saturday
He’s robbing everybody that he can
But he goes to church on Sunday
So they say that he’s an honest man
3. I always thought my family doctor
Honest as could be
Until I had a pain the other day
He said, “You have appendicitis I can plainly see
You need an operation right away”
He charged three hundred dollars for that operation
Then he found I only had a stomach ache
He left his scissors in me
When he sewed me up again
Then he went and marked me
“Opened by mistake,” and
4. I’ve lost my faith in lawyers, too
There’s one a friend of mine
I thought that he was honest and O. K.
I asked him once if he supposed
The weather would be fine
He anwered, “No, it’s sure to rain today”
Next day I got a note which read
“I’ve sent my bill to you
Ten dollars for opinion on the rain
I wouldn’t pay, he sued me
And he got a judgement, too
I was busted
So he took my watch and chain.” and